We have a state-of-the-art city park just a stone’s throw from our home.  It’s complete with walking trails, soccer fields, skate park, basketball courts, batting cages and all the other amenities a ‘good park’ could have.  It was a major factor in our decision to purchase in this neighborhood.  You know, “Location, location, location.”

We headed there a couple of days ago so the boys could play while I did my 40-minute walk around the trails.  On my first go-round, I noticed what appeared to be some unsavory characters huddled in a battered vehicle ‘doing business’ at an odd time of day…I immediately changed my route and walked only where I could eyeball the boys along my path.  Then, I came upon a mob of troubled-looking youth who had, it appeared, just trashed a walking trail with lots of broken glass.  A dark cloud was over their heads and I wondered where their parents were.  The girls in their skin-tight jeans and spandex tops couldn’t have been much older than 13.  The boys outnumbered them, and didn’t appear to have a whole lot of ‘grey matter’.  Sad.

I think we need to remind ourselves that we don’t live in Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood and Andy Griffith probably isn’t the guy we see playing catch with Opie at the ball field.  City parks don’t equal safety and wholesome environments, no matter how fancy their toys or how virtuous their signage.  Let’s be vigilante in this hour, with our children.

Give in, give up, stop believing, step backwards.

When: 

• Monday shows up.
• The battle rages. 
• Children perpetually push the limits.
• You’re exhausted.
• You don’t ‘feel’ like fighting.
• The world is not “as it should be”.
• “The sun’s not shining down on me”.
• You hit one more bump.
• You wrestle one more crocodile.
• Stand Your Ground and Wait For God.
• (Eph. 6:13…after you have done everything, to stand.)

He never fails.

He always shows up.

You will win if you decide that victory is your only option.

Galatians 6:9  Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest IF WE DO NOT GIVE UP.

  J. Michael Smith, President of the Home School Legal Defense Association (www.hslda.org), interviewed me recently on the topic of ‘Raising Extraordinary Boys’, and it’s airing this week (Mon-Fri, March 10-14) on Home School Heartbeat, a daily radio program aired on over 600 affiliates nationwide and produced by HSLDA.

Click on www.homeschoolheartbeat.com (or cut and paste to your browser) and you will find station listings and an opportunity to hear the interview online.

Spring has sprung here in Northern California, and these beautiful blossoms greet me every time I turn into this tree-lined alley near our home.  What a gorgeous display!  What promise they proclaim, of the new beginnings of one of our favorite times of the year.

Did you know that the number 8 signifies new beginnings in scripture?  When I turned the calendar page to January 1, 2008, I began to ask God, and to believe Him for a season of new things. 

Perhaps it’s time to believe God for something fresh and new for you and yours.  Let’s allow the natural things to speak to us of the spiritual things God wants to do for us, in us and through us.

As of today, you’ve spent just 68 days of this year that I’m proclaiming as a year of NEW BEGINNINGS, which means you’ve got about 297 more days left of 2008 to posture yourself toward asking, knocking and seeking Him, all the while expecting Him to reveal Himself to you in some new ways.  Why not?  Why remain living the same ol’, same ol’? 

My husband urged me today to walk outside and take these photos, before time and the wind robs these branches of their beauty.  I want to urge you in the same way, not to put off doing what must be done…you know in your heart of hearts what that is.   Let’s truly believe Him for NO! Ordinary Year….

Pre-prayer meeting at church begins in 28 minutes and you need 15 of those to drive to the building.  O.K….You can feel it in the air….TENSION!!!  Brett can’t find his left shoe (surprise, surprise :)), you probably should have woken the kids earlier, but they were up a bit late last night (again)…Daddy seems on edge because the clock is ticking and he hates to be late…the younger two didn’t have breakfast and you can’t locate a healthy snack to grab - darn! - you knew you should have picked up that box of healthy granola bars when you ran into the grocery store yesterday…lunch won’t be for AGES….rats!  You’ll have to do your make-up in the car yet again…”Stop fighting!”  you yell to the middle two as they bicker over a stupid plastic toy from last week’s Not-So-Happy Meal….

AT THIS MOMENT THINGS COULD GET WORSE OR THINGS COULD GET BETTER.  IT’S UP TO YOU, MOM.

• Praise God.  Verbally and in your heart.
• Stay positive and put it all into perspective.  Jon won’t die if he eats a handful of mini-wheats and a piece of cheese on the way to church.
• Keep your mouth shut as much as is possible.  We gals can stir up stuff quicker than a snap of the fingers, if we’re not careful.  Bless, bless, bless.
• Look at the bright side…at least 1 million other families across the earth and going through the same motions at this moment!  You’re in good company.
• Plan for success for next week.  Stock up on what is a reality breakfast for Sunday morning.  Make the kids pick out every single item they’ll need for dressing for church Sunday, on SATURDAY NIGHT before they watch the movie.  Might not be a bad idea for you to do the same, Mom, if you’re anything like me!
• Go to my January 13th 2008 post:  The Power of the Local Church and remind yourself of why you’re doing what you’re doing!
• Happy Sunday!

As the week winds down, my fridge is usually filled with odds and ends, bits and pieces and the makings for all sorts of tasty tidbits.  I am also ready for a break and really don’t want to decide ‘what to make for dinner’.  This little exercise will test your kids’ creativity and maturity, and they better pass the test or they’ll go hungry!  If you take inventory and can honestly say that any intelligent human being can create something relatively nutritious from the ingredients your cupboards and refrigerator/freezer contain…then proclaim it an “Every Man For Himself Dinner Night”.

A FEW TIPS FOR SUCCESS: 

• Scribble a list of what you see that can be created from what you have on hand.
• Give a specific older child responsibility to prepare something for a specific younger sibling (never assume :).)
• Give everyone a time limit and nutritional boundaries, ie., fruit roll-ups are off-limits and popcorn or French bread with butter does not qualify as a meal (at least make a fruit smoothie and a peanut butter sandwich on wheat bread to go with the popcorn), and, the meal will be eaten and cleaned up by 7 p.m. or you don’t eat.  (otherwise they’ll put if off because they’ll get lazy and be hungry at 9:30!)
• Each child is responsible to clean up the details of their own preparation and meal mess.
• Assign each older, capable child a final task such as sweeping kitchen, cleaning surfaces, scrubbing sink….so you can walk into a ‘clean as a whistle’ kitchen later.
• DO prepare something for hubby because he’s your man and you love him and want to serve him and he worked hard all day, too!  Unless of course he offers to take you out, then - whoo-hoo - it’s party time!  Or perhaps a really good-cook-of-a-child would serve Pops well, then by all means, ‘assign’ Daddy’s meal to that kid!
• DISAPPEAR…to your room, to the patio, or to the yard to read, to write a letter or to make a phone call to a friend for a nice catch-up-chat.
• THEN….when ‘time’s up’:
• Interview the brood and find out what they prepared for themselves and their younger siblings.  Admonish the brutes who starved the little ones and bless those who who took the charge seriously and did their best, even if it wasn’t your best.
• Check the chores to make sure they were done.

BUT DENISE….

Perhaps you’d say, “Doesn’t sound like much of a ‘Vacation’ to me.”  But I’d say, “if you train ‘em right once, you’ll have bought yourself many more pleasant ‘Every Man For Himself Dinner Nights’  to come in the future!”

*This is a Mini-Vacation with lots of bang for your buck:  A fair amount of emotional investment ONE TIME ONLY; after that, they’ll be a breeze!

I’m determined to chat with my kids.  It takes an effort when we’re all pretty high-energy, easily distracted by life and stimulated by our surroundings - but I can’t bear to simply be ’ships passing in the night’ 24/7, which can easily happen in our chaotic culture. I wanna talk.  If I want them to talk, then I have to ask them something pertaining to what they like to talk about.

Mom:  “What is your absolute number one favorite meal?”

Seth: (without batting an eye)  “Garlic mashed potatoes with fresh Brussels sprouts and green beans cooked with a little bacon and New York steak marinated and grilled to perfection, a little red in the middle.”

Other questions:

• “What was the highlight of your day?”
• “What’s your dream job?”
• “What’s your favorite sport to watch?  Play?”
• “Tell me about a person you love to hang with.”

Setting….

Where do you get a conversation going?  Sometimes you gotta get them alone, or at least next to you, getting their attention, to get them to talk.  Even when it’s difficult.  Let’s say they’re feeling like ‘hermit-ing” which you are not willing to allow them to do regularly.  Some teens would prefer this habit and some personalities could live in an 8 X 5 foot room, curtains drawn, for a lifetime, I’m convinced!  If their bent is to be alone, then it’s time for an ‘intervention’. 

Mom:  “Jack, come to the kitchen and help me cook dinner.”

Jack:  (grumbling, huffing, puffing, groaning) “Aw, maaa…I wanna read my new book (which he already read 4 times this month).”

Mom:  “Be down here in 60 seconds or I’ll starve ya.”

Jack:  (visibly distraught, long-faced and dragging his feet, he pops into the room).

Mom:  “OK, you chop the tomatoes, tiny please and then grate this block of cheese.  I’ll get your brother to clean the cilantro and crack the eggs.  When that’s done, I’ll tell you what’s next.”

What I find is that while we’re working away in the kitchen, Jack is trapped and he forgets he’s ‘miserable’ and pretty soon, a somewhat tense moment turns into laughter, discussion, dreaming together and forming our godly worldview through all sorts of verbal exchanges.  Some of our happiest and most meaningful moments have been around one of my salsa-making schemes, a smoothie-making moment, pancake prep, or during the pre-barbecue preparations on Friday afternoon.  I love to get my boys in the kitchen: slicing, dicing, chopping, frying, shaking, measuring and creating something really tasty to eat while I get inside their minds and hearts.  Not only will you ‘find’ one another, you’ll cut your work time in at least half by engaging the help of your youngsters.

Let’s remember to STOP and CONNECT with these precious ones we care so much about.

Today I was walking merrily along a concrete path. I love  to walk outside, listening to my Ipod.  I’ve downloaded portions of the Bible, and can listen, pause and pray, listen some more, pause and pray and have a really good time with Jesus while I get some much-needed exercise, fresh air, solitude, and sunshine (when it’s available).  Technology is amazing.  Then, when I’m ready to shift into another gear, I find some great worship music, push play and go absolutely crazy, running like a loon down sidewalks, across fields, leaping, dancing and getting the victory!!!  You really should try it, if you haven’t.  It’s such a comprehensive spiritual and physical workout.  Today as I meandered about at a decent pace toward the end of my walk, I found myself studying the beautiful flowers along the edges of the sculpted trail.  Lots of green, glossy leaves framed the full, lush blossoms of God’s gorgeous roses.  This one reminded me of someone in the prime of life - in their very best and most beautiful season.  Strong, hearty, ripe, and fragrant.  So much to give.  

Then I came across this one.  A brand-new, healthy and ready-to-burst-into-full-bloom red rose.  Looks like she won the genetic lottery.  Florists would prize this baby.  Lovers send them regularly.  This bud is full of promise.  An entire future ahead just waiting to be realized.  I can almost smell the fragrance to come….

Suddenly I came upon this tired soul.  All the best of its strength used up in days gone by.  Beaten by the winds, bludgeoned by life’s hard hits.  No one will stop to smell this fellow anymore.  About all that’s left are memories of what once was…

Which of these best describes you?  Are you a new bud, with the bulk of your life ahead-all of life’s most important choices yet to be made-great promise just waiting to unfold?…Or are you in your absolute prime, with all of your best attributes shining already?…Soon, yes, sooner than you know, you will have spent the bulk of your life, and if so, will you be glad about how you spent it and what you spent it on?  I’ve been spending a good amount of time in the book of James lately.  Perhaps that’s why these flowers were speaking so loudly to me today…

“What is your life?  You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.”  James 4:14

“For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed.  In the same way, the rich man will fade away even while he goes about his business…” James 1:11

Let’s spend our days wisely.  This little rhyme is in my head…

“Just one life, twill soon be past; only what’s done for Christ will last.”

Coulda’ been something real little…might have been something real big, but you are feeling the heat. Beating yourself with the mental bat. Up in the middle of the night, rewinding the tapes so you can ‘fix’ it and re-do it, at least mentally. Say different words. Don’t say ANYthing. Drive a different route. Cancel the appointment. Don’t press ‘send’ on the computer button. Don’t buy a computer! Pretty soon, this becomes a mountain that insures more defeat.

Stop it.

You gotta put down the bat and tell yourself the truth:

You love God.

God loves YOU and is for you and ready to help you, NOW.

You’re doing your best to serve Him and to fulfill His purposes for your life, your family’s lives and those in your sphere of influence.

He who never takes a swing, will never hit a homerun.

Most people are going through the motions, but you’re trying to ‘up the ante’ and really make a difference. Of course you’ll encounter setbacks.

This will keep you humble, which is vital for future success.

This will be a turning point, a defining moment and you’ll never be the same.

This pothole will provide encouragement for others when they fall down.

Soberly evaluate just how big a deal it is and how far-reaching the consequences are.

Will Oprah televise your failure to millions of people anytime soon?

Don’t forget - In God, there is always hope. He specializes in messes and He can redeem it.

Today is a new day, with new possibilities. 

Receive God’s grace!

So, your husband isn’t all you dreamed of, and come to think of it, he’s a real disappointment at the moment…the kids aren’t ‘responding well’ (to put it lightly) to the standards you’re trying to implement; in actual fact it seems that conflict abounds…the bank account is nothing short of lame, and you quit your job to be busy at home…you have been busy gaining 5 pounds even though you’re trying hard to eat right…the neighbors you’re trying to evangelize just aren’t ‘getting it’…where’s the beef, Lord????  You feel like giving up, or at least giving in…

“Be patient then brothers, until the Lord’s coming.  See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains.  You, too, be patient and stand firm, because THE LORD’S COMING IS NEAR!” (James 5:7-8)

Even in a ‘lull’ when nothing seems to be as you would like it to be…

GOD IS AT WORK BEHIND THE SCENES!

He is working on something valuable; something worth waiting for.

The farmer can’t see the seed growing under the dirt.  He can’t see the rain that will surely be coming from heaven -  YET.  He can walk around the field every single day, stomping his foot and grumbling, wishing to see the little green plants pushing up through the soil, but his fruitless activity won’t speed things up.  If he believes his eyes, then all his labor has been in vain and he has nothing to look forward to.  BUT A FARMER KNOWS BETTER.  He is convinced of what’s going on under the surface of things.  He sees beyond the natural and is aware of the organic life of God bubbling beneath the top layer of dirt.  He knows he will reap precisely what he has sown, if he continues doing the right stuff.  All in good time with some nurture, some water, some fertilizer and a whole lot of patience…he’s gonna get far more than what he planted.

Keep sowing, keep praying, keep believing, keep hoping, keep standing firm on the promises of God’s Word as they apply to your situation, because THE LORD’S COMING IS NEAR!