Some mothers seem to sail through, knowing just what to do and when. Never obsessing about the details. Not me. I am Queen of Obsession. I can fixate on any minute detail – your choice.
Just ask my kids.
I’ll consider, pray, ponder and get whiplash just trying to make the perfect, life-altering decision.
I’m getting better at menus.
But we’re talking kids. Futures. DESTINIES!
While raising my boys, I could freak out and melt down (and I did at times) about what party they could attend, which girls were calling, how late they should stay up, how early they should rise, whether to say yes, whether to say no, whether to ignore it and it would go away…if you’re a parent, you get me. And sometimes, even after hunger strikes, praying, and collecting the counsel of my trusted advisors…I still think I messed it up.
My glaring inadequacies loomed large. My endless piles of disorganized efforts – my untied loose ends. My #fears and #fails. But I clung by faith to my dreams for my sons like a hungry dog with a bone, and I trusted God to meet me, day-by-day. And He did. Beyond what I could have imagined.
What’s important for you to remember, mom and dad….most days of child rearing aren’t mountain-top days, no matter what Facebook or Instagram tries to tell you. They are plateau days full of ‘dailies.’ Bumps, bills, tangles, re-starts, emotions, disarray, rinse and repeat.
Yes, there were perfect days that shone bright, breathing new life into my mother heart, energizing me to press on toward the finish line, but there were many more quiet, unassuming days of routine and hiddenness…seemingly inconsequential.
But the thing about God is this: He more often than not, hides the significant in the seemingly insignificant.
And that’s exactly why so many women miss the boat.
They get restless amidst the tedium, and begin to scan the horizon above their kids’ heads for something…more…meaningful, lucrative, consequential. Completely unaware that those little ones under their noses are, hands down, the most mind-boggling, remunerative, explosive investments they could ever buy into,
Once upon a time, my five sons were little boys around my feet. Playing G.I. Joes, writing spelling lessons, doing household chores, delighting my heart with their childish antics. The greatest joy of my life on this earth. But I’ve found that as time goes on, their value multiplies exponentially like compound interest on a massive 401K. God’s miraculous nest egg.
Robert Brault put it this way, “Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.”
We liberated women have become so smart, we can put a pencil to paper and figure that it’s cheaper to hire out our kids’ training to someone else so we can busy ourselves creating more income and status, building investments for the future, when actually, our children are our future.
Can I say that again a little louder? Because it’s become so real to me in midlife.
Our children are our future!
I feel quite emotional this very moment as I consider the times along the way when I couldn’t see beyond myself and I missed out on some things of much greater value right in front of me. We all do it. I just want to warn you to do it less!
Let’s think twice about what we think we know about everything. The value of our kids, our marriages, our character, our lifestyles, our daily schedules, our pressing to-do’s. Things aren’t always as they appear. Let’s soften our hearts and look again below the surface of things. We just might find the treasure we seek in the things closest to us.
Your Two-Minute Takeaway
- Think for a moment: Are you content with your weekly schedule as it pertains to nurturing those souls entrusted to you? If you hesitated to answer that question, what’s bothering you? What would you like to change?
- Where did you learn your parenting style? Did you consciously choose it, or did it become your default because it’s all you knew growing up? Is it serving you and your children well?
- Fast Forward 20 years and imagine what kind of friendship you and your children will have, based on the friendship you’re building today. What would you like to add to your recipe?
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